Shovels Anonymous. SA

[Not a hacker]

Drawing on my own experience as a long time GFF snob living in a world of denial, I see a need for a formalised self help plan to allow players of cavity back irons to deal with the stygma and perceived humiliation of playing 'sod laying chopper shovels', particularly if you are also a member of GR. As such I have tried to model a code based on the successful AA 12 steps program.

The first thing I must do is accept my situation, so "My name is Not a Hacker, and I play cast, CB, SGI, POS, sod laying hacker shovels" (you can play with the wording to suit yourself).

With that out of the way we come to the 12 steps. As GR has been declared a religion free zone (thanks mainly to HB's infamous religion thread) all of the AA 12 steps that mention 'higher powers', 'salvation', 'god' or other religious terms of reference must be left out.

So that baiscally leaves step 9, making amends. So to Edgey, Kiwi, No Shuz and (if you're out there reading this) Kenny Perry, I may have derided your choice of equipment over the years, and for that I apologise.

Now that that's out of the way hopefully I can now proudly walk onto the first tee with a bag of irons that look more suited to gardening than golf, and get rid of the dark glasses, collar pulled up etc. I'm starting to feel better already.

[Kiwi Player]

Drawing on my own experience as a long time GFF snob living in a world of denial, I see a need for a formalised self help plan to allow players of cavity back irons to deal with the stygma and perceived humiliation of playing 'sod laying chopper shovels', particularly if you are also a member of GR. As such I have tried to model a code based on the successful AA 12 steps program.

The first thing I must do is accept my situation, so "My name is Not a Hacker, and I play cast, CB, SGI, POS, sod laying hacker shovels" (you can play with the wording to suit yourself).

With that out of the way we come to the 12 steps. As GR has been declared a religion free zone (thanks mainly to HB's infamous religion thread) all of the AA 12 steps that mention 'higher powers', 'salvation', 'god' or other religious terms of reference must be left out.

So that baiscally leaves step 9, making amends. So to Edgey, Kiwi, No Shuz and (if you're out there reading this) Kenny Perry, I may have derided your choice of equipment over the years, and for that I apologise.

Now that that's out of the way hopefully I can now proudly walk onto the first tee with a bag of irons that look more suited to gardening than golf, and get rid of the dark glasses, collar pulled up etc. I'm starting to feel better already.

OI!

Leave me out of this you cast POS CB SGI playing sod laying chopper.

I'm playing GFF (including blades) these days!!!

[Not a hacker]

OI!

Leave me out of this you cast POS CB SGI playing sod laying chopper.

I'm playing GFF (including blades) these days!!!

But I recall giving you plenty when you were bagging the R7s, so I'm making amends for that.

[oldplayer]

Nah you do realise the purpose of AA is to enable alcoholics to enjoy total abstiance from alcohol?
Therefore SA should have the same related goals. To help you maintain a life totally free from shovel use.

Ist step. " We realised our games had become unmanagable and we were powerless over using shovels."

2nd. Step. "Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves (GR) could restore us to sanity."
etc. etc.

Quite the opposite of now being able to walk onto the first tee with a clear mind, you must now have the courage of your convictions and ditch the shovels forever.
To stay true to your proposal you must now immediately bag some GFF blades AND continue to seek the fellowship of SA.
I applaude you taking a stand Nah but a lame apology to Kenny Perry just won't cut it.

[Not a hacker]

Nah you do realise the purpose of AA is to enable alcoholics to enjoy total abstiance from alcohol?
Therefore SA should have the same related goals. To help you maintain a life totally free from shovel use.
Ist step. " We realised our games had become unmanagble and we were powerless over using shovels.
2nd. Step. Came to realise that a power greater than ourselves (GR) could restore us to sanity.
etc. etc.

Quite the opposite of now being able to walk onto the first tee with a clear mind, you must now have the courage of your convictions and ditch the shovels forever.
To stay true to your proposal you must now immediately bag some GFF blades AND continue to seek the fellowship of SA.
I applaude you taking a stand Nah but a lame apology to Kenny Perry just won't cut it.

Damn, I didn't think this through clearly. I've never acknowledged my own drinking problems so don't really know much about AA. I thought it was just a way to deal with being an alcoholic, didn't really get into the nitty gritty of their code like abstaining.

Anyway, I love the TPS 6.0s, so I'm not abstaining.

[oldplayer]

Damn, I didn't think this through clearly. I've never acknowledged my own drinking problems so don't really know much about AA. I thought it was just a way to deal with being an alcoholic, didn't really get into the nitty gritty of their code like abstaining.

Anyway, I love the TPS 6.0s, so I'm not abstaining.

Let this be a lesson to you to not go off "half cocked".

[Not a hacker]

Let this be a lesson to you to not go off "half cocked".

Being 'half cocked' has never stopped anyone posting befpre, so why start now?

[oldplayer]

Being 'half cocked' has never stopped anyone posting befpre, so why start now?

That's true, but I thought with your seniority you may have had a higher standard for yourself than the usual riff-raff and rabble.

[SoonerBS]

My only hopes is that Omen will decide to post more. Are you feeling a little bulk coming on lately, NAH? Maybe a little more flesh in the tits? With Mickelboobs sporting Ping Eye 2 wedges and Perry still clinging to the R7s, I thought maybe you had to carry a little weight in order to hit the shovels these days.

Go ahead, NAH, and switch on over to the PING Eye 2s . . . . . . I have a feeling you have a longing to do so. Then, we could give you and FD a room where you could pleasure each other . . . . . . .

[edgey]

NAH

Still playing Wide Soles, still unrepentant. So f uck you

That being said there are a set of MP 68's with Reg DG on e bay that i may bid on..........

Edgey

[Kiwi Player]

NAH

Still playing Wide Soles, still unrepentant. So f uck you

That being said there are a set of MP 68's with Reg DG on e bay that i may bid on..........

Edgey

If you don't like them PM me and I'll take them off your hands. (I'll be visiting the UK in June ).

[Kiwi Player]

Nah you do realise the purpose of AA is to enable alcoholics to enjoy total abstiance from alcohol?
Therefore SA should have the same related goals. To help you maintain a life totally free from shovel use.

Ist step. " We realised our games had become unmanagable and we were powerless over using shovels."

2nd. Step. "Came to believe that a power greater than ourselves (GR) could restore us to sanity."
etc. etc.

Quite the opposite of now being able to walk onto the first tee with a clear mind, you must now have the courage of your convictions and ditch the shovels forever.
To stay true to your proposal you must now immediately bag some GFF blades AND continue to seek the fellowship of SA.
I applaude you taking a stand Nah but a lame apology to Kenny Perry just won't cut it.

Well done OP.

NAH was seriously heading off down the wrong path (again!!!). Good to bring him back to the straight and narrow even if you can't bring him back to his senses!

[A V Twiss]

Drawing on my own experience as a long time GFF snob living in a world of denial, I see a need for a formalised self help plan to allow players of cavity back irons to deal with the stygma and perceived humiliation of playing 'sod laying chopper shovels', particularly if you are also a member of GR. As such I have tried to model a code based on the successful AA 12 steps program.

The first thing I must do is accept my situation, so "My name is Not a Hacker, and I play cast, CB, SGI, POS, sod laying hacker shovels" (you can play with the wording to suit yourself).

With that out of the way we come to the 12 steps. As GR has been declared a religion free zone (thanks mainly to HB's infamous religion thread) all of the AA 12 steps that mention 'higher powers', 'salvation', 'god' or other religious terms of reference must be left out.

So that baiscally leaves step 9, making amends. So to Edgey, Kiwi, No Shuz and (if you're out there reading this) Kenny Perry, I may have derided your choice of equipment over the years, and for that I apologise.

Now that that's out of the way hopefully I can now proudly walk onto the first tee with a bag of irons that look more suited to gardening than golf, and get rid of the dark glasses, collar pulled up etc. I'm starting to feel better already.

I have a really excellent self help plan. I just couldn't give a flying f uck what anyone thinks about the clubs I play.

[noshuz]

So that baiscally leaves step 9, making amends. So to Edgey, Kiwi, No Shuz and (if you're out there reading this) Kenny Perry, I may have derided your choice of equipment over the years, and for that I apologise.

Well I find myself in somewhat of a conundrum. Although it is public knowledge that do in fact have shovels in my bag, they are in fact, GFF. That being said, my question is, does one cancel out the other? It's kinda like what they say about black men being well hung and fat men being not so well hung. You see where I'm going with this?
Yes, I feel like that Fat Black Man......

[SoonerBS]

So that baiscally leaves step 9, making amends. So to Edgey, Kiwi, No Shuz and (if you're out there reading this) Kenny Perry, I may have derided your choice of equipment over the years, and for that I apologise.

Well I find myself in somewhat of a conundrum. Although it is public knowledge that do in fact have shovels in my bag, they are in fact, GFF. That being said, my question is, does one cancel out the other? It's kinda like what they say about black men being well hung and fat men being not so well hung. You see where I'm going with this?
Yes, I feel like that Fat Black Man......

FD has admitted to sporting a 9" dick, so obviously, the size of one's dick does not determine whether they are a good golfer or not. FD plays PING Eye 2s, so he is obviously bluffing about being a good golfer.

Omen has set the standards for "true golfers" somewhat on this forum -- a set of irons STARTS with 3 iron through PW and does not include a hybrid of any kind, the set will be blades, or at the least "player's clubs," GFF certainly establishes some quality in a set, but contrary to modern thinking on this forum, anything not found in the MP line of Mizuno in your bag will lower you to hacker status. Drivers, putters and balls are a little looser defined.

I can't qualify as a "true" golfer because I still bag a "thriver" which is the only worthwhile contribution that Edgey has ever made to this forum. Until I can find another way to take my ball immediately up over 200 yards of trees and land it safely on the green 260 yards away on a Par 4 (my #9 hole), the thriver will stay in my bag. I am currently working on a more legitimate means at the moment though . . . . .

[The Purist]

Now that that's out of the way hopefully I can now proudly walk onto the first tee with a bag of irons that look more suited to gardening than golf, and get rid of the dark glasses, collar pulled up etc. I'm starting to feel better already.

This sounds more like a guy coming out of the closet, than some kind of 12 step program....

[Omen2]

Yeah He's Pretty Much A Fa.g Now.

Hey When Are You Adding The Hybrid, Lovett, And Tampon Dispenser?

Omen

[edgey]

If you don't like them PM me and I'll take them off your hands. (I'll be visiting the UK in June ).

I am watching them and VERY tempted.

Where you visiting in the UK in June. Can we set up Edgey v Kiwi?

Edgey

[noshuz]

I am watching them and VERY tempted.

Where you visiting in the UK in June. Can we set up Edgey v Kiwi?

Edgey

Oh OH! I smell the makings of an OFFICIAL thread coming!!

[lorenzoinoc]

NAH, thank you for this valuable thread. I'd like to add an SA step: Addressing the homosexuality that is the real driving force behind shovel usage .

[noshuz]

NAH, thank you for this valuable thread. I'd like to add an SA step: Addressing the homosexuality that is the real driving force behind shovel usage .

Oh Tho Sthop it! yer terrible!! hehehehehe

[Kiwi Player]

I am watching them and VERY tempted.

Where you visiting in the UK in June. Can we set up Edgey v Kiwi?

Edgey

I'd love to but in reality the chances of this happening are somewhere between slim and zero. We are on a 5 week trip to Germany, Italy and the UK. We will be in London about a week (with a day/overnight trip to Paris thrown in) and we will also be travelling up to Edinburgh for a few days. A visit to the old course is on the cards but I'm not likely to actually play.

I have friends & relatives in London and we are attending a friends wedding in Germany.

Hell even a match up with NAH or Oldplayer is hard to organise and those guys are only a 3 hour flight across the ditch away.

So as much as I would love to set up a friendly Edgey v Kiwi match up it is about as likely as Larryrsf breaking 80 or accepting swing advice from Alangbaker.

[Not a hacker]

FD has admitted to sporting a 9" dick, so obviously, the size of one's dick does not determine whether they are a good golfer or not. FD plays PING Eye 2s, so he is obviously bluffing about being a good golfer.

Omen has set the standards for "true golfers" somewhat on this forum -- a set of irons STARTS with 3 iron through PW and does not include a hybrid of any kind, the set will be blades, or at the least "player's clubs," GFF certainly establishes some quality in a set, but contrary to modern thinking on this forum, anything not found in the MP line of Mizuno in your bag will lower you to hacker status. Drivers, putters and balls are a little looser defined.

I can't qualify as a "true" golfer because I still bag a "thriver" which is the only worthwhile contribution that Edgey has ever made to this forum. Until I can find another way to take my ball immediately up over 200 yards of trees and land it safely on the green 260 yards away on a Par 4 (my #9 hole), the thriver will stay in my bag. I am currently working on a more legitimate means at the moment though . . . . .

I know Omen has been a vocal golfing purist on this forum, but you may have missed his latest bag setup in the WITB thread. He now bags a Titleist D1, which no self respecting golfer would allow anywhere near his bag. He has lost all his golfing purist privileges on GR. I would say your thriver is more manly than a POS D1, closed face draw bias hacker shovel. He also has a Scotty, which makes him a sucker. The only regular forum member who can go through their whole bag and stil qualify as GR certified real man golfer is ZO, his set is 'traditionalist' through and through (I'm assuming he doesn't have a hybrid in there, but I may be wrong about that). Unfortunately for me, he has also given me a carpeting, but I would nothing less from such a paragon of GR tradition.

[oldplayer]

I know Omen has been a vocal golfing purist on this forum, but you may have missed his latest bag setup in the WITB thread. He now bags a Titleist D1, which no self respecting golfer would allow anywhere near his bag. He has lost all his golfing purist privileges on GR. I would say your thriver is more manly than a POS D1, closed face draw bias hacker shovel. He also has a Scotty, which makes him a sucker. The only regular forum member who can go through their whole bag and stil qualify as GR certified real man golfer is ZO, his set is 'traditionalist' through and through (I'm assuming he doesn't have a hybrid in there, but I may be wrong about that). Unfortunately for me, he has also given me a carpeting, but I would nothing less from such a paragon of GR tradition.

I was under the impression that a hybrid is GR sanctioned as long as it is a 5 wood replacement.

[Kiwi Player]

I was under the impression that a hybrid is GR sanctioned as long as it is a 5 wood replacement.

You are correct, a gaybrid is deemed acceptable if it is no more than a 5 wood replacement however NAH leads a vocal minority who will protest the presence of ANY gaybrid in the bag.

BTW a 5 wood replacement should be no greater than 19 degrees. Your 21* gaybrid is getting far too close for comfort to a 3 iron replacement.

[oldplayer]

You are correct, a gaybrid is deemed acceptable if it is no more than a 5 wood replacement however NAH leads a vocal minority who will protest the presence of ANY gaybrid in the bag.

BTW a 5 wood replacement should be no greater than 19 degrees. Your 21* gaybrid is getting far too close for comfort to a 3 iron replacement.

If you have read my sig lately you will notice that I have swapped out the 21 for a 19 of the same make and model, put the 3 iron back in and dropped the specialist sand wedge. No need to apologise, although you usually are on top of EVERY detail. and for HAH's benefit I have checked Loz's sig and he does in fact bag a 19 degree hybrid. I'm afraid NAH is out in the cold on this one.

[Kiwi Player]

If you have read my sig lately you will notice that I have swapped out the 21 for a 19 of the same make and model, put the 3 iron back in and dropped the specialist sand wedge. No need to apologise, although you usually are on top of EVERY detail. and for HAH's benefit I have checked Loz's sig and he does in fact bag a 19 degree hybrid. I'm afraid NAH is out in the cold on this one.

LOL - yes I must apologise. I read your sig as soon as I had posted. Good to see you are conforming within accepted GR conventions!

It's time NAH dropped that gay, old mans 5 wood and got some real irons. What's become of him???

[oldplayer]

LOL - yes I must apologise. I read your sig as soon as I had posted. Good to see you are conforming within accepted GR conventions!

It's time NAH dropped that gay, old mans 5 wood and got some real irons. What's become of him???

Check out the Tourstage thread. I've managed to find a decent set of irons for him. He's got no excuses either they are practically in his neibourhood I think. Have a look.

[lorenzoinoc]

If you have read my sig lately you will notice that I have swapped out the 21 for a 19 of the same make and model, put the 3 iron back in and dropped the specialist sand wedge. No need to apologise, although you usually are on top of EVERY detail. and for HAH's benefit I have checked Loz's sig and he does in fact bag a 19 degree hybrid. I'm afraid NAH is out in the cold on this one.

Yes, I carry a 5 wood replacement hybrid because I got tired of watching obnoxious opponents escape the rough in a way a long iron user like myself could not. But I'd swear that stinkin' hybrid is f.ucking up my other clubs. I may need to interrogate some of them to find out. If it's true, the hybrid goes in the trash.

[Kiwi Player]

NAH

Still playing Wide Soles

Edgey

I guess you would need Wide Soles to prevent the clubs digging into the bog at this time of year if your golf courses are anything like the rugby fields I used to play on in England in February. The thin soled 68's may have to wait till June-July, assuming you get a summer this year.

[SoonerBS]

I was under the impression that a hybrid is GR sanctioned as long as it is a 5 wood replacement.

This is incorrect. Gaybrids are never accepted as a legitimate weapon. Any man using a gaybrid for any reason should go ahead and drop his drawers and paint "screw" on one arse cheek and "me" on the other . . . . .

[Horseballs]

Yes, I carry a 5 wood replacement hybrid because I got tired of watching obnoxious opponents escape the rough in a way a long iron user like myself could not. But I'd swear that stinkin' hybrid is f.ucking up my other clubs. I may need to interrogate some of them to find out. If it's true, the hybrid goes in the trash.

I've got the same setup, except I've got a 54 instead of a 52.
The 3 iron allows me to perform my favorite and most consistent shot. I don't do it a ton, but I can hit a low screaming hook that goes forever with the 3 iron. It gets about 10 feet off the ground and moves at least 15-20 yards left. Great out of trouble shot on par 5's.
I could actually see taking out an iron to allow for another wedge, but I'm not sure it would be the 3 iron.