GR rules of golf

[emc]

Let's make up some new rules here, about things that really matter on the course! I'll get the ball rolling.

The wearing of tight-fitted clothing for intimidation purposes is strictly forbidden. The punishment for a violation of this rule shall be 2 strokes on every hole the violation occurs in strokeplay. In matchplay the opponent gets to kick the sh!t out of you

Mention of the Cleveland Hi-Bore is punishable by castration

Slow play shall be reported to the marshall who reserves the right to shoo slow players on sight. Shooting shall only be to kill, as injuring said slow players shall result in longer rounds

Anyone else think of any more 'rules'?

[dorkman53]

Anyone caught leaving sunflower seed shells or cigarette butts on the green will be required to chew and swallow said objects, or choose the alternative of having them stuck up their nose or rectum.

Anyone talking during a swing or backswing will be deprived of their tongue and lips immediately, via the "tongs and tin snip" method.

Anyone driving a cart right up next to a green will simply be shot on sight. (No bothering to let the punishment fit the crime for this offense.)

Anyone posting on GR under multiple personalities will be deprived of their computer, disconnected from their electricity, and have both hands amputated by a butter knife.

[golfaholic]

[QUOTE=dorkman53
Anyone posting on GR under multiple personalities will be deprived of their computer, disconnected from their electricity, and have both hands amputated by a butter knife.[/QUOTE]


NOOOOO!!!!!, you'll never find me!!!!!!!!!

[Joeysdaddy2004]

Anyone who comes to this site looking for tips en lieu of getting lessons from an actual golf instructor will be sentenced to a head full of contradictions and misinformation, due in no real part to those giving said misiformation; bad golf will ensue

Those who troll threads for opportunities to post negative replies or using various pseudonyms to avoid accountabilty when they are called on their B. S. will be sent to bed early without dessert by his/her mommy (after we're done with her) and made to stand in the corner

Anyone who posts false club distances on the inevitably recurring "How Far Do You Hit It?" threads will be shot into space where zero gravity will allow their carry distances to finally be accurate

Those who reduce golf related threads to anti-US/Europe/anywhere arguments will be sent to said locations and forced to partake in an actual fist fight with the largest inhabitant of that part of the world; if he/she wins, he/she will be allowed to speak ill of any member of said location