B!tchmoves on the golf course

[Horseballs]

As a golfing purist, there a few things that drive me apeshitt crazy. I'm going to go ahead and lable these as b!tchmoves. Please feel free to add to the list.
1. People who slice or hook the piss out of the ball, then play up an adjoining fairway. Play the hole you're on, b!tch.
2. People who are quick on the trigger to take relief from something they shouldn't have to worry about. Like a ball 4 feet from a cart path that may possibly be an issue if they were hitting a driver.
3. Not playing the hole the way it's designed. This goes along with #1, but is actually the inspiration for this thread. We have a par 5 that is a 90 degree dogleg left. From the back tees, you can actually hit a shot 90 degrees away from the fairway towards another hole's green, take relief if you hit it, and go for the green in 2 from about 150. I played with an asshat who pulled that move this weekend. Lost all respect for the guy.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

As a golfing purist, there a few things that drive me apeshitt crazy. I'm going to go ahead and lable these as b!tchmoves. Please feel free to add to the list.
1. People who slice or hook the piss out of the ball, then play up an adjoining fairway. Play the hole you're on, b!tch.
2. People who are quick on the trigger to take relief from something they shouldn't have to worry about. Like a ball 4 feet from a cart path that may possibly be an issue if they were hitting a driver.
3. Not playing the hole the way it's designed. This goes along with #1, but is actually the inspiration for this thread. We have a par 5 that is a 90 degree dogleg left. From the back tees, you can actually hit a shot 90 degrees away from the fairway towards another hole's green, take relief if you hit it, and go for the green in 2 from about 150. I played with an asshat who pulled that move this weekend. Lost all respect for the guy.

4. Using a tee made out of anything other than wood
5. Using low compression golf balls because you can't compress a man's ball
6. Wearing a hat with a golf company's logo/name on it
7. Clipping a divot tool to your belt
8. Having more than 2 hybrids in your golf bag
9. Playing a mixed set of irons (blade short irons and shovel long irons)
10. Owning a cart bag
11. Wearing a visor
12. Having a towel in your back pocket
13. Using a ball washer

[noshuz]

I used to have a golf partner that would give me his "theoretical" score. I would ask him what he got and it always be "well, if I didn't hit that sprinkler head and land in the ruff it would have been a par. Well that's great DB but YOU DID hit the sprinkler head and YOU DID go in the ruff! It got to be comical because he didn't even realize he was doing it.
Is that what we call a blind bichmove?

[The Purist]

Good topic. But a word of warning...I might come up with "the official" list of b!tchmoves on the golf course sometime in the near future.

I agree about the not using another hole to play a hole...it should be an automatic out of bounds because it creates slow play. But who cares if you play a hole the way its designed. I always look to overpower doglegs if possible. If you can get a drive up quickly, then there are a lot of risk reward doglegs that can be cut.

[Horseballs]

But who cares if you play a hole the way its designed. I always look to overpower doglegs if possible. If you can get a drive up quickly, then there are a lot of risk reward doglegs that can be cut.

That's not what I'm talking about. Cutting a corner is a legit move. Our 4th hole is a par 5. Our 2nd hole is a par 3, and it just so happens that the 2nd and 4th greens are about 100 yards from each other. D-bags will play through a gap in the trees off the tee box towards the 2nd green (which is nowhere near the fairway for #4) so they can hit onto the 4th green in 2. It's hard to explain, but you'll just have to take my word that it's a huge b!tchmove.

[KoolCat]

14. People who hit 200 yard drives and then wait for the green to clear (300 yards away) before hitting their second shot.
15. Not letting groups play through when you are slow as shite, have open hole(s) ahead of you and people waiting on every shot behind you.
16. People who take 6 mulligans per round, don't count out of bounds as stroke AND distance, but think they have shot a legitimate score.
17. People that get really pissed off or throw clubs when they hit a bad shot.

[Horseballs]

4. Using a tee made out of anything other than wood
5. Using low compression golf balls because you can't compress a man's ball
6. Wearing a hat with a golf company's logo/name on it
7. Clipping a divot tool to your belt
8. Having more than 2 hybrids in your golf bag
9. Playing a mixed set of irons (blade short irons and shovel long irons)
10. Owning a cart bag
11. Wearing a visor
12. Having a towel in your back pocket
13. Using a ball washer

All of those were covered under a masterpiece thread entitled "How to spot a chopper on the course." B!tchmoves are a different animal. I'll see if I can dig that up for your reading pleasure.

http://forums.golfreview.com/showthread.php?t=10296

[The Purist]

I am feeling the b1tchmove theme now.

A. People who lose their ball in the woods, then "find it" when no else is looking and shout how lucky they got with the lie.

B. People who fail to carry a hazard, and drop a ball adjacent to where it landed in the hazard rather than where it first crossed into the hazard.

C. People who announce they will be playing lift, clean, and place because it rained 3 days ago.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

I am feeling the b1tchmove theme now.

A. People who lose their ball in the woods, then "find it" when no else is looking and shout how lucky they got with the lie.

B. People who fail to carry a hazard, and drop a ball adjacent to where it landed in the hazard rather than where it first crossed into the hazard.

C. People who announce they will be playing lift, clean, and place because it rained 3 days ago.

I played with a guy in Florida who claimed to have driven his ball straight down the fairway, but for some reason it was no where to be found. Right smack in the middle of the fairway was a land crab hole that was about 3 inches wide. He claimed that his ball must have gone in the hole since we couldn't find it, and that he was due a free drop at that point. I called BS on him and told him to stick his hand down in that hole and produce the ball. He was afraid of what was down in there (can't say I blamed him). So I sent him back to the tee and hit another. To me that was one of the biggest b!tchmoves I've seen.

[alangbaker]

As a golfing purist, there a few things that drive me apeshitt crazy. I'm going to go ahead and lable these as b!tchmoves. Please feel free to add to the list.
1. People who slice or hook the piss out of the ball, then play up an adjoining fairway. Play the hole you're on, b!tch.

Last time I looked, the RoG didn't say anything about that.

The 11th on my home course (as much as any course is my home course) is a par 5 I can drive, but only if I take a big rip at the ball. That occasionally turns my power fade into a slice. Fortunately, that just means it goes over the trees and into the 10th fairway, and from there my best play is sometimes straight towards the 10th tee. If that's my best play, I play it.

2. People who are quick on the trigger to take relief from something they shouldn't have to worry about. Like a ball 4 feet from a cart path that may possibly be an issue if they were hitting a driver.

If you're not in a match against, them, who the hell cares what they do? If you are, don't let them get away with anything illegal.

3. Not playing the hole the way it's designed. This goes along with #1, but is actually the inspiration for this thread. We have a par 5 that is a 90 degree dogleg left. From the back tees, you can actually hit a shot 90 degrees away from the fairway towards another hole's green, take relief if you hit it, and go for the green in 2 from about 150. I played with an asshat who pulled that move this weekend. Lost all respect for the guy.

Beat you, did he?

If you can do it, do it. Golf is about getting the ball into the holes in the fewest possible strokes.

[alangbaker]

4. Using a tee made out of anything other than wood

Because...

5. Using low compression golf balls because you can't compress a man's ball

Use whatever ball you like.

6. Wearing a hat with a golf company's logo/name on it

You worry a lot about trivia, don't you?

7. Clipping a divot tool to your belt

Ditto.

8. Having more than 2 hybrids in your golf bag

But a 7-wood is a club for "real men"!

9. Playing a mixed set of irons (blade short irons and shovel long irons)

But all shovels is cool!

10. Owning a cart bag

Trivia

11. Wearing a visor

Trivia

12. Having a towel in your back pocket

Trivia

13. Using a ball washer

Because washing your ball when you don't have a wet towel is wrong?

[alangbaker]

14. People who hit 200 yard drives and then wait for the green to clear (300 yards away) before hitting their second shot.

Yup.

15. Not letting groups play through when you are slow as shite, have open hole(s) ahead of you and people waiting on every shot behind you

Ditto.

16. People who take 6 mulligans per round, don't count out of bounds as stroke AND distance, but think they have shot a legitimate score

I don't care what they think. But if we're playing a match, they're going to get a rude awakening.

17. People that get really pissed off or throw clubs when they hit a bad shot.

Yup.

18. People that stand by the green futzing when there are people behind them waiting on the tee.

19. People who think that because their friends are playing from the back tees, they should too, even though they can't hit a drive 200 yards.

20. People who play with friends who aren't as good as they are, but won't move up a set of tees to have the group play from the tees most appropriate to its weakest player.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

Last time I looked, the RoG didn't say anything about that.

The 11th on my home course (as much as any course is my home course) is a par 5 I can drive, but only if I take a big rip at the ball. That occasionally turns my power fade into a slice. Fortunately, that just means it goes over the trees and into the 10th fairway, and from there my best play is sometimes straight towards the 10th tee. If that's my best play, I play it.



If you're not in a match against, them, who the hell cares what they do? If you are, don't let them get away with anything illegal.



Beat you, did he?

If you can do it, do it. Golf is about getting the ball into the holes in the fewest possible strokes.

I don't think anyone here is surprised you condone and defend b!tchmoves on the golf course.

[alangbaker]

I don't think anyone here is surprised you condone and defend b!tchmoves on the golf course.

I condone playing by the RoG.

I condone doing everything you can to play fast and maintain the pace of play.

Within those limits, I condone doing whatever you think is best to get the ball in the hole in the fewest strokes.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

I condone playing by the RoG.

I condone doing everything you can to play fast and maintain the pace of play.

Within those limits, I condone doing whatever you think is best to get the ball in the hole in the fewest strokes.

You contradict yourself. Playing up another hole's fairway does not do much to quicken the pace of play.

[alangbaker]

You contradict yourself. Playing up another hole's fairway does not do much to quicken the pace of play.

It does nothing to slow it down, either. If your ball is on the other fairway, it's on the other fairway. You have to play a stroke, regardless.

[Horseballs]

Last time I looked, the RoG didn't say anything about that.

The 11th on my home course (as much as any course is my home course) is a par 5 I can drive, but only if I take a big rip at the ball. That occasionally turns my power fade into a slice. Fortunately, that just means it goes over the trees and into the 10th fairway, and from there my best play is sometimes straight towards the 10th tee. If that's my best play, I play it.



If you're not in a match against, them, who the hell cares what they do? If you are, don't let them get away with anything illegal.



Beat you, did he?

If you can do it, do it. Golf is about getting the ball into the holes in the fewest possible strokes.

Alan, if you play up the wrong fairway there is nothing illegal about it, but it's a huge b!tchmove. Be a man and get back into position without getting in other people's way and trying to justify your shittty drive that got you out of position.
The guy who hit onto 2 from 4 was playing in my group but not against me. I called him a b!tch and my other playing partners agreed. Deliberately taking advantage of adjacent holes is a classic b!tchmove.
I have a feeling most of your 79's would be 85's if you didn't play like a b!tch.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

It does nothing to slow it down, either. If your ball is on the other fairway, it's on the other fairway. You have to play a stroke, regardless.

Your support of crappy golfers committing these b!tchmoves makes us all sick.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

Alan, if you play up the wrong fairway there is nothing illegal about it, but it's a huge b!tchmove. Be a man and get back into position without getting in other people's way and trying to justify your shittty drive that got you out of position.
The guy who hit onto 2 from 4 was playing in my group but not against me. I called him a b!tch and my other playing partners agreed. Deliberately taking advantage of adjacent holes is a classic b!tchmove.
I have a feeling most of your 79's would be 85's if you didn't play like a b!tch.

You mean his two 79's??? Alan rarely breaks 80.

[alangbaker]

Alan, if you play up the wrong fairway there is nothing illegal about it, but it's a huge b!tchmove. Be a man and get back into position without getting in other people's way and trying to justify your shittty drive that got you out of position.

I don't try an justify it. I just make the best play from wherever my ball comes to rest.

If you can't imagine how to do that without holding up others, that's your problem.

The guy who hit onto 2 from 4 was playing in my group but not against me. I called him a b!tch and my other playing partners agreed. Deliberately taking advantage of adjacent holes is a classic b!tchmove.

Nope. It's smart golf.

I have a feeling most of your 79's would be 85's if you didn't play like a b!tch.

And I have a feeling that those 85s (if it actually happened that way) would be good enough to beat you.

[alangbaker]

You mean his two 79's??? Alan rarely breaks 80.

LOL

My scores

[alangbaker]

Your support of crappy golfers committing these b!tchmoves makes us all sick.

Your calling various things "*****moves" so that you can explain away your poor scores makes me laugh.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

LOL

My scores

Your scoring average is 85.1. You're a hack. Not only that, but your pic would suggest wear a name tag at work.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

Your calling various things "*****moves" so that you can explain away your poor scores makes me laugh.

You're one of the few pathetic enough to post your personal info on here. You have no idea what my scores are, and I'm not dumb/pathetic enough to post them here.

[Horseballs]

I don't try an justify it. I just make the best play from wherever my ball comes to rest.

If you can't imagine how to do that without holding up others, that's your problem.





Nope. It's smart golf.



And I have a feeling that those 85s (if it actually happened that way) would be good enough to beat you.

I just looked at your scores, Alan. You are a 10.5 playing a course rated 67.7. When you play outside of McGoattrack, you struggle to break 90. You have been exposed as a b!tchplaying chopper. Your 79 only rates as a 10.7 differential. Go back to picking on Larry because you are in way over your head.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

I just looked at your scores, Alan. You are a 10.5 playing a course rated 67.7. When you play outside of McGoattrack, you struggle to break 90. You have been exposed as a b!tchplaying chopper. Your 79 only rates as a 10.7 differential. Go back to picking on Larry because you are in way over your head.

Yeah I saw that too. I would bet he couldn't break 110 at Bulle Rock. If he'd like to try I will meet him there.

[alangbaker]

Your scoring average is 85.1. You're a hack. Not only that, but your pic would suggest wear a name tag at work.

LOL

And I've broken 80 4 times in my last 20 full rounds. In what fantasy world of yours, is that "seldom"?

As for the name tag: project much?

LOL

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

LOL

And I've broken 80 4 times in my last 20 full rounds. In what fantasy world of yours, is that "seldom"?

As for the name tag: project much?

LOL

You play on a toy golf course. Your scores on courses with decent ratings are all much higher. What a laugh!!!

[alangbaker]

I just looked at your scores, Alan. You are a 10.5 playing a course rated 67.7. When you play outside of McGoattrack, you struggle to break 90. You have been exposed as a b!tchplaying chopper. Your 79 only rates as a 10.7 differential. Go back to picking on Larry because you are in way over your head.

In the common vernacular: "*****, please!"

You can look up "vernacular".

[alangbaker]

You play on a toy golf course. Your scores on courses with decent ratings are all much higher. What a laugh!!!

When's the last 110 I shot, 3-jack?

LOL

[Horseballs]

Another b!tchmove is putting out of a bunker. Of course this isn't possible at a finely manicured championship layout like the SPCC, but I've seen no-confidence b!tches do this move when the bunker lips allow it. Is it even golf at this point?

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

In the common vernacular: "*****, please!"

You can look up "vernacular".

Alan, HB is correct. You play a toy golf course...and poorly at that.

[alangbaker]

Yeah I saw that too. I would bet he couldn't break 110 at Bulle Rock. If he'd like to try I will meet him there.

How much you want to bet? If it's worth my while, I'll come.

Say, airfare + hotel + green fee + $500.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

When's the last 110 I shot, 3-jack?

LOL

Probably the last time you played a man's golf course.

[alangbaker]

You're one of the few pathetic enough to post your personal info on here. You have no idea what my scores are, and I'm not dumb/pathetic enough to post them here.

LOL

Wow: the guy making all the noise about *****moves is hiding behind the skirts.

LOL

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

How much you want to bet? If it's worth my while, I'll come.

Say, airfare + hotel + green fee + $500.

So you're willing to bet me more that $1000 that you, a 10 handicapper, who plays exclusively on goat tracks is going to come to a course I've played a bunch of times and beat me? Sounds like a good deal for me. When can you get here?

[alangbaker]

So you're willing to bet me more that $1000 that you, a 10 handicapper, who plays exclusively on goat tracks is going to come to a course I've played a bunch of times and beat me? Sounds like a good deal for me. When can you get here?

Nope. I'm going to take you up on the bet you offered: that I can't break 110 there.

So? You up for it or not?

[Horseballs]

In the common vernacular: "*****, please!"

You can look up "vernacular".

If you adhere to the ratings, your 79 is equal to more than an 84 at my home track from the white tees. Another b!tchmove is padding your vanity cap by playing pitch and putt courses.

[alangbaker]

If you adhere to the ratings, your 79 is equal to more than an 84 at my home track from the white tees. Another b!tchmove is padding your vanity cap by playing pitch and putt courses.

My cap is my cap. The rating and slope take into account whether its an easy course or not.

[alangbaker]

So you're willing to bet me more that $1000 that you, a 10 handicapper, who plays exclusively on goat tracks is going to come to a course I've played a bunch of times and beat me? Sounds like a good deal for me. When can you get here?

BTW, your actual home course looks pretty much like mine. Mt. Pleasant rates a little a little harder from the whites than McCleery, but not much, and the blues are pretty much the same.

[alangbaker]

If you adhere to the ratings, your 79 is equal to more than an 84 at my home track from the white tees. Another b!tchmove is padding your vanity cap by playing pitch and putt courses.

Wow. I'd get one more stroke on Maketewah than I get at McCleery...

LOL

[poe4soul]

3. Not playing the hole the way it's designed.

Question on degrees of biatch move.
1) if I play my miss to be in an adjacent fairway, is that a BM? On one of the holes the water is down the right, and sand traps down the left. There an area in the rough between the traps on the left and the adjacent fairway that takes all out the crap out of play. I have to hit a 30 yard draw to get the ball to turn down this lane but it takes everything out of play. A straight drive is in the other fairway but is still ok for the approach. (Be careful with this because I'm playing the hole exactly the way I watch Fred Couples play it three years in a row.)

2) On one of the courses I play there is two parallel fairway on one of the holes. The other fairway is a tighter play but if you drive the ball farther than 250 it has a better angle into the green. Much harder shot but has good reward. I'll do it if there isn't anyone in the other fairway. I won't do it if I have to wait for it to clear. Is that a ***** move?

BTW - your course just needs a local rule to make the play out of bounds. If it doesn't exist then WTF. Sounds like it could be a bit dangerous for the people on the par 3 if everyone decided to do this.

[SoonerBS]

Looking like a manage et twa in here . . . . . . very kinky . . . . .

[Not a hacker]

Back to b!tch moves. I won't talk about playng other fairways, as on some holes there is a definite advantage going down another fairway which can still be manly. At an old course I was a member at there was a par 4 where the best angle of attack was an adjacent fairway, but it required a big drive to get to the correct spot on that fairway. Only long hitters and low markers could attempt it, a classic risk and reward shot. IMO this is not a b!tch move, but an ultra macho route. The most b!tch moves I see on the course are from the greenskeepers. Like putting the tee markers really clos together on the left side of the tee box on dogleg left holes, forcing you to play a draw. Or leaving the rough thick at the front of the green and the high side, but shaving the back and low side so you have to fly the green with the risk of it running off into trouble. I have no problem with tough course setuops, but some dumb fuk greenskeepers don't understand the difference between tough and unfair. A course should be set up consistently on each hole and in a way that there are numeorus strategies to play each hole, instead of trying to dictate how to play it. But my number 1 greenskeeper b!tch move is the lazy prik who lifts the outside of the cup up when changing holes, so every putt breaks away from the hole no matter which side you come in form. This forces you to hit it firm straight over the front of the hole, thus taking all the skill out of dying it into the side or back door.

[ProStatus]

1. Guys with hat clips for their ball marker{ I though only the LPGA used those.

2. Asking what club I hit { ARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!!!! ...I hate that sh it).

3. Cargo Pants or shorts with the shirt untucked.{ Its cool to let your shirt hang out but not while wearing frikin cargo shorts}.

4. Asking me where did my ball go after I hit it..................STFU

5. Riding your cart up to the tee while a group is teeing off while your clubs make all the clitty clackitty sounds known to man.{ Stay back and wait mofo , until we tee off.)

[Not a hacker]

I forgot the ultimate b!tch move on the course. Laying up on a par 5 and trying to wedge it in close. Zach Johnson did this on every par 5 of the Masters he won, what more proof of b!tch move is there than that?

[alangbaker]

I forgot the ultimate b!tch move on the course. Laying up on a par 5 and trying to wedge it in close. Zach Johnson did this on every par 5 of the Masters he won...

Sorry, but I must have missed everything after "he won...".

[dano8238]

With all this bashing going on,I kinda lost track of this wrong fairway deal,so let me get this straight.This golfer hit his driver purposely into the other fairway to avoid the hazards on his own fairway-if this is the case I agree as being a ***** move,however a mishit on your drive into another fairway and played back on your own fairway,acceptable.

[alangbaker]

With all this bashing going on,I kinda lost track of this wrong fairway deal,so let me get this straight.This golfer hit his driver purposely into the other fairway to avoid the hazards on his own fairway-if this is the case I agree as being a ***** move,however a mishit on your drive into another fairway and played back on your own fairway,acceptable.

It's not a b*tch move either way.

The rules of golf say "go from tee to hole in the fewest strokes". That's all.

If that happens to be by hitting into a different fairway, the problem is the course design, not the golfer.

[Robledo11]

People who shank every shot and 6 putt every hole but dress up like tiger when they have no business near a golf course

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

BTW, your actual home course looks pretty much like mine. Mt. Pleasant rates a little a little harder from the whites than McCleery, but not much, and the blues are pretty much the same.

I haven't played Mt. Pleasant in a year. My usual track now is The Timbers at Troy...in Ellicott City, MD. Please tell me what the rating of Mt. Pleasant is from the blue tees??? I assure it is much higher than the goat track you play on. I seem to remember you saying you could beat me. I've offered you this invitation to come on down and join me for a round at Bulle Rock. Winner gets $1000.

[Horseballs]

Question on degrees of biatch move.
1) if I play my miss to be in an adjacent fairway, is that a BM? On one of the holes the water is down the right, and sand traps down the left. There an area in the rough between the traps on the left and the adjacent fairway that takes all out the crap out of play. I have to hit a 30 yard draw to get the ball to turn down this lane but it takes everything out of play. A straight drive is in the other fairway but is still ok for the approach. (Be careful with this because I'm playing the hole exactly the way I watch Fred Couples play it three years in a row.)

2) On one of the courses I play there is two parallel fairway on one of the holes. The other fairway is a tighter play but if you drive the ball farther than 250 it has a better angle into the green. Much harder shot but has good reward. I'll do it if there isn't anyone in the other fairway. I won't do it if I have to wait for it to clear. Is that a ***** move?

BTW - your course just needs a local rule to make the play out of bounds. If it doesn't exist then WTF. Sounds like it could be a bit dangerous for the people on the par 3 if everyone decided to do this.

1) Poe, you are borderline b!tchmove with your 30 yard draw. I'll allow it for now, but if there wasn't an adjacent fairway to miss your drive in, would you even attempt this shot? Probably not, which means you are a semi-b!tch.
Fred Couples is a b!tch, however.
2) Are you saying a hole has a split fairway or you can drive the ball down another hole's fairway. The latter = b!tchmove.

I've never even imagined someone would try that shot at my course. I thought my club had high integrity people.

[poe4soul]

Then I guess those are b!tch eagles I made driving the narrow gap to the other fairway. Like NAH said it's not a play anyone without distance and good control of their drive would attempt. I can see were your coming from though.

Is it a BM if you slice or hook the ball unintentionally to an adjacent fairway and then play the ball down the length of the other fairway and chip up to your green to avoid a punch out to your fairway? I see hackers do this all the time. I've even done it but usually will just try to work the ball through a slot, mostly because it affects pace of play.

Yours is simple, tell the pro that you are concerned that someone might get hit on the par 3 with this tee shot and suggest they make that shot OB. If it' reasonable, especially if there's concern for the players on the par 3, it shouldn't be allowed.

Ultimately, if I'm in a competition and can see a way to shot a lower number within the rules, I'll do it. If you were my opponent and you started whining like a little girl there would be no question who the b!tch is at that moment.

[Horseballs]

Is it a BM if you slice or hook the ball unintentionally to an adjacent fairway and then play the ball down the length of the other fairway and chip up to your green to avoid a punch out to your fairway? I see hackers do this all the time. I've even done it but usually will just try to work the ball through a slot, mostly because it affects pace of play.

This is the exact BM I'm speaking about. It's not illegal, just a BM.

I would never try to talk someone out of a BM strategy, I would just lose all respect for that person. My respect is a currency you want to deal in. I'm kind of a big deal...

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

People who shank every shot and 6 putt every hole but dress up like tiger when they have no business near a golf course

You don't have enough posts to contribute to this thread. STFU newbie.

[noshuz]

Oh Oh! Wiggles is grumpy again! I bet you haven't had your fruit cup yet have ya big guy?

[Horseballs]

I will not permit my thread to be sidetracked by another newb vs. Wiggles confrontation.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

I will not permit my thread to be sidetracked by another newb vs. Wiggles confrontation.

The rules must be enforced at all costs. We can't have newbs posting broken english nonsense all over this board. Some day you'll thank me.

[noshuz]

I will not permit my thread to be sidetracked by another newb vs. Wiggles confrontation.

OK OK. But wiggles is so much fun!
Move along.....All is well here.......

[Horseballs]

Back to b!tch moves. I won't talk about playng other fairways, as on some holes there is a definite advantage going down another fairway which can still be manly. At an old course I was a member at there was a par 4 where the best angle of attack was an adjacent fairway, but it required a big drive to get to the correct spot on that fairway. Only long hitters and low markers could attempt it, a classic risk and reward shot. IMO this is not a b!tch move, but an ultra macho route. The most b!tch moves I see on the course are from the greenskeepers. Like putting the tee markers really clos together on the left side of the tee box on dogleg left holes, forcing you to play a draw. Or leaving the rough thick at the front of the green and the high side, but shaving the back and low side so you have to fly the green with the risk of it running off into trouble. I have no problem with tough course setuops, but some dumb fuk greenskeepers don't understand the difference between tough and unfair. A course should be set up consistently on each hole and in a way that there are numeorus strategies to play each hole, instead of trying to dictate how to play it. But my number 1 greenskeeper b!tch move is the lazy prik who lifts the outside of the cup up when changing holes, so every putt breaks away from the hole no matter which side you come in form. This forces you to hit it firm straight over the front of the hole, thus taking all the skill out of dying it into the side or back door.

A serious b!tchmove is complaining about the course set-up. 2006-2008 NaH would be ashamed at the fatshaft playing, b!tchmove utilizing shell you've become in 2009.

[alangbaker]

I haven't played Mt. Pleasant in a year. My usual track now is The Timbers at Troy...in Ellicott City, MD..

And yet, Mt. Pleasant is listed as your home course on your profile...

Please tell me what the rating of Mt. Pleasant is from the blue tees??? I assure it is much higher than the goat track you play on..

It's a little higher.

I seem to remember you saying you could beat me. I've offered you this invitation to come on down and join me for a round at Bulle Rock. Winner gets $1000.

I think I can beat you, but the bet you offered was that I couldn't break 110 there...

...and now you're crawling away...

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

And yet, Mt. Pleasant is listed as your home course on your profile...




It's a little higher.



I think I can beat you, but the bet you offered was that I couldn't break 110 there...

...and now you're crawling away...

If you think you can beat me then come on down. I will gladly play a round with you. Bulle Rock from the tips. You win I'll pay you $1000...I win you pay me $1000.

Regarding your statement about Mt. Pleasant...you've outted yourself as a liar.

The course rating from the blue tees is 71.9 (it's a par 71). That is substantially higher than the 67 rated goat track you play. Also if you had a clue, you'd know they used to play the Eastern Open at Mt. Pleasant. Sam Snead, Ben Hogan, and Arnold Palmer have their names on a trophy in the clubhouse.

You've been badly embarrassed in this thread...if you'd like to carry that embarrassment over to the golf course please accept my invitation to play Bulle Rock.

[poe4soul]

Got to agree on this one. There must be different degrees of BM's then. The one you described in #4 is a Total BM and would require them to be called out and I would loose respect for them. Others or just "head shakers" or a bullshi!t comment.

Honestly, if I was teeing off on the par 3 and saw someone taking relief on my green and I realized they were playing the hole you mentioned, I would fire my tee shot with no regard for their safety. To me the real offense is the way his play is going to affect the pace of play and the others enjoyment of their round. I give very little respect for people like this.

I reported a total BM to the pro this last weekend. This group in front of us was a fivesome with 4 set's of clubs. No big deal to us we figured they paid. I saw that they had at least a case in a sixer in the back of there cart. Not a big deal, I often sneak booze onto the course. By the 15th one of them became very loud and started to annoy the hell out of us. But we let it slide. On sixteen he drove his cart mid way up the men's tee box. After his drive he drove over the corner and over the middle of the forward tees. He proceeded to drive over the next tee box on 17 and was showing total disregard to the course and others around him - BM. Called the pro shop they came out and witnessed it on 18 and escorted him off the course. Turns out they only paid for 4. Pro gave us a rain check for 9 holes which was nice but totally unnecessary.

[alangbaker]

If you think you can beat me then come on down. I will gladly play a round with you. Bulle Rock from the tips. You win I'll pay you $1000...I win you pay me $1000.

I think I can beat you, but there's another challenge already on the table...

Regarding your statement about Mt. Pleasant...you've outted yourself as a liar.

LOL

The course rating from the blue tees is 71.9 (it's a par 71). That is substantially higher than the 67 rated goat track you play.

The blue tees at McCleery slope rate 70.6 with a 129 slope. BTW, you know you can look this kind of thing up online, right. If you had, you'd have saved yourself some (more) embarrassment.

Also if you had a clue, you'd know they used to play the Eastern Open at Mt. Pleasant. Sam Snead, Ben Hogan, and Arnold Palmer have their names on a trophy in the clubhouse.

They used to play tournaments at a lot of courses that they can't play anymore because they're too short/easy.

You've been badly embarrassed in this thread...if you'd like to carry that embarrassment over to the golf course please accept my invitation to play Bulle Rock.

LOL

First you have to deal with the challenge that's already under discussion...

[alangbaker]

Got to agree on this one. There must be different degrees of BM's then. The one you described in #4 is a Total BM and would require them to be called out and I would loose respect for them. Others or just "head shakers" or a bullshi!t comment.

Honestly, if I was teeing off on the par 3 and saw someone taking relief on my green and I realized they were playing the hole you mentioned, I would fire my tee shot with no regard for their safety. To me the real offense is the way his play is going to affect the pace of play and the others enjoyment of their round. I give very little respect for people like this.

Sorry, but if the player can see that no one is on the green, then fire away.

The correct way to deal with that happening is appropriate course design.

There's a par 4 at McCleery that doglegs around a tee box and a par three green. Here:

Number 8 at McCleery

The 8th tee is directly north of the eastern edge of the vacant lot in the lower left and the green is in the lower right hand corner. Between tee and green are both the 4th tee and the third green...

...and a whole lot of trees. There's a tall stand right behind the back tees for the 4th (where the path in the middle of the shot loops around with a small bridge), and there's a stand of really tight cedars beyond the 3rd green that has a water hazard at the bottom.

Combine that with the fact that the 8th green itself has water to the right of the green, and OB to the right of the fairway, and it pretty much takes the play of shooting directly for the green out of your hands. I did it once on a lark, but it would be far too easy to lose a ball by having no evidence at all of where it had gone, and that would result in a long trudge back to the tee.

Design prevents people from trying to cut the corner, not "b*tch moves".

[poe4soul]

Agreed about the course design. Even if they plant trees today to block this shot they will not be tall enough to render play for a long time. Really all that is required is an OB markers for that hole on that side of the fairway and a local rule. I've seen it on many courses. Usually to speed up play, but could be to stop people from playing the course in a dangerous way.

[KoolCat]

The Google Maps images of McCleery are amazing. You can actually see the goats...

[alangbaker]

Agreed about the course design. Even if they plant trees today to block this shot they will not be tall enough to render play for a long time. Really all that is required is an OB markers for that hole on that side of the fairway and a local rule. I've seen it on many courses. Usually to speed up play, but could be to stop people from playing the course in a dangerous way.

I agree you can do it with an inside the course OB... ...I just find those so fake.

[Horseballs]

The Google Maps images of McCleery are amazing. You can actually see the goats...

I'd like to know how it's possible for a par 72 to get rated as a 67.7.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

I think I can beat you, but there's another challenge already on the table...



LOL



The blue tees at McCleery slope rate 70.6 with a 129 slope. BTW, you know you can look this kind of thing up online, right. If you had, you'd have saved yourself some (more) embarrassment.



They used to play tournaments at a lot of courses that they can't play anymore because they're too short/easy.



LOL

First you have to deal with the challenge that's already under discussion...

Alan the scores you posted show you played a course with a 67 rating. Stop lying. Now accept my challenge...or leave the board.

[alangbaker]

Alan the scores you posted show you played a course with a 67 rating. Stop lying. Now accept my challenge...or leave the board.

Courses have more than one set of tees, 3-jack.

I'm beginning to suspect you don't play golf so much as talk it.

As for your challenge, I accepted the first one... ...and now you're wiggling.

[Horseballs]

Courses have more than one set of tees, 3-jack.

I'm beginning to suspect you don't play golf so much as talk it.

As for your challenge, I accepted the first one... ...and now you're wiggling.

True, but your sweet 79 was from tees rated 67.7.
I will put up $100 of the purse for you to break 110 at Bulle Rock.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

True, but your sweet 79 was from tees rated 67.7.
I will put up $100 of the purse for you to break 110 at Bulle Rock.

Alan doesn't understand such complex golf terms. He's also scared to play me.

[lorenzoinoc]

Leaving your tee in the ground after you've hit as a way of saying you hit a good drive is a b.m.

Making the rest of your group wait while you're on your cellphone is a b.m.

Taking a sh.it is a b.m, strictly speaking.

Alan, golf's basic rule is that it be played with honor. Don't intentionally hit into another fairway in front of a made guy.

[alangbaker]

True, but your sweet 79 was from tees rated 67.7.
I will put up $100 of the purse for you to break 110 at Bulle Rock.

So was my 75.

If you want to put up part of the purse, great.

I stated my terms: the bet has got to be enough to cover my costs plus an additional $500 for my time.

[lorenzoinoc]

Agreed about the course design. Even if they plant trees today to block this shot they will not be tall enough to render play for a long time. Really all that is required is an OB markers for that hole on that side of the fairway and a local rule. I've seen it on many courses. Usually to speed up play, but could be to stop people from playing the course in a dangerous way.

Poe, you clearly aren't a b.m. kind of guy. So I suspect power, in terms of your being able to hit extremely long drives, is beginning to corrupt you.

Be cautious as once you lose your soul, you could start following people around the internet.

[alangbaker]

Alan doesn't understand such complex golf terms. He's also scared to play me.

Not in the slightest.

You're scared to accept the bet you proposed.

[lorenzoinoc]

I stated my terms: the bet has got to be enough to cover my costs plus an additional $500 for my time.

I question the math here. Alan, if you don't have a job, how is your time worth $500?

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

So was my 75.

If you want to put up part of the purse, great.

I stated my terms: the bet has got to be enough to cover my costs plus an additional $500 for my time.

Some how I don't think a tow truck driver's time is worth that much.

Congrats on the 75. Must have really felt good shooting that low on the 5800 yard pitch and putt you played.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

Not in the slightest.

You're scared to accept the bet you proposed.

LOL at the guy that only wants part of a bet if it's about him being able to break 110.

[alangbaker]

I question the math here. Alan, if you don't have a job, how is your time worth $500?

I get paid $60 - $75 an hour.

[lorenzoinoc]

True, but your sweet 79 was from tees rated 67.7.
I will put up $100 of the purse for you to break 110 at Bulle Rock.

NIce job with this thread. I wouldn't have seen the direction it was capable of taking. You are kind of a big deal. I'd use that as my sig. and quote you, but then Ron Burgundy/Will Ferrell might have a problem with not being properly quoted.

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

I get paid $60 - $75 an hour.

Is that the car hookup fee? How much per mile?

[alangbaker]

Some how I don't think a tow truck driver's time is worth that much.

Congrats on the 75. Must have really felt good shooting that low on the 5800 yard pitch and putt you played.

You not thinking is something I can believe.

And you bet it did.

As did my 73 here: Greenacres Scorecard

Only 6000 yards, but tight trees on every fairway and greens the size of postage stamps. To be fair, the par should actually be 70 and not 71.

[alangbaker]

Is that the car hookup fee? How much per mile?

Whatever I do for a living, it's enough to put up $1,000 on the bet you're busy wiggling away from...

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

You not thinking is something I can believe.

And you bet it did.

As did my 73 here: Greenacres Scorecard

Only 6000 yards, but tight trees on every fairway and greens the size of postage stamps. To be fair, the par should actually be 70 and not 71.

LOL!!!! Every hack that shoots a good score on a pathetic golf course always says its really tight. LOL!!!!

[Mr 3 Wiggle]

Whatever I do for a living, it's enough to put up $1,000 on the bet you're busy wiggling away from...

I see you're not denying that you tow cars for a living.

No one is wiggling out of anything. I've proposed a match and you're scared. Step up and take the challenge.

[Horseballs]

NIce job with this thread. I wouldn't have seen the direction it was capable of taking. You are kind of a big deal. I'd use that as my sig. and quote you, but then Ron Burgundy/Will Ferrell might have a problem with not being properly quoted.

That's the weaker part of my quote. I am actually going to make the other part my new sig. Yes, some will call me pretentious for using my own quote as my signature, but greatness must rise above the petty jealousies of lesser men.

[alangbaker]

LOL!!!! Every hack that shoots a good score on a pathetic golf course always says its really tight. LOL!!!!

Judge for yourself:

Greenacres

You do know how to read a scale, right?

[lorenzoinoc]

greatness must rise above the petty jealousies of lesser men.

It's what this thread is about. It's what the Alan/3W gun duel is about. And it's what this country is about.

[lorenzoinoc]

That's the weaker part of my quote. I am actually going to make the other part my new sig. Yes, some will call me pretentious for using my own quote as my signature, but greatness must rise above the petty jealousies of lesser men.

Like the new sig. But I can't believe you aren't giving me any credit.

[alangbaker]

I see you're not denying that you tow cars for a living.

I've also not denied piloting the shuttle for a living.

No one is wiggling out of anything. I've proposed a match and you're scared. Step up and take the challenge.

No, you proposed a bet that I couldn't break 110 at Bulle Rock and now you're scared.

Once we've dealt with that bet, then we can move on to the next.

[Horseballs]

Now that the Alan v. Wiggles match has been successfully branched into other threads, it's safe to get back to talking about b!tchmoves on the golf course. I've got more.
Using a hybrid or putter from the rough around the green. The only non-b!tch ways to play this shot are either a bladed wedge or a standard chip.
Another b!tchmove is to backhand a three footer and give yourself the putt. Supreme b!tches will miss the putt then scoop it back and try to make it regularly. I've missed plenty of 2 footers trying my hardest and they all count.

[pat_bateman25]

On a cart-path-only day early in the season, we were unfortunate to be playing behind a foursome (2 carts) that would TAKE TURNS walking from the cart-path out to their balls rather than going at the same time. At the peak, they were holding up 11 people (our 4-some, another, and a 3-some) One of the players in this slow group took the cake as the most inconsiderate and oblivious golfer any of us had seen... ever. His skill-level was not suprisingly below-average as well.
For 8 holes (before the marshall MADE the group let us play through) we had to watch this 50-some year old man's ridiculous routine.
For every approach shot (there were alot), this guy would walk 30-50 yards out to his ball... survey the lie and distance... walk 30-50 yards back to his cart... decide on a club... walk 30-50 yards back out to the ball... line up the shot... take 4, yes 4! practice swings... and then "address" the ball for literally anywhere from 30-45 seconds (we timed him) before shooting. He would just stare at the ball like he had fallen asleep. For fun my buddies and I would speculate and imitate the possible conversations going on in his head. When it wasn't funny anymore we gave a few "C'mon!'" and "Lets Go!" yells that he definately heard since he looked back at us, however, this man's routine did not change a bit. Disbelief and dumbfoundedness eventually overshadowed the mixture of more hostile/negative emotions we developed. This, I suppose, was a good thing for him during the minute or two when we played through. Not a word was spoken. We don't know how many other groups got past them, but we didn't have anyone behind us the rest of the day.

[Not a hacker]

Congrats in advance on the 100 post thread HB. Having Alan and Wiggles going toe to toe bumped it a bit, but a 100 thread post is always an achievement. All you need now is for Fred to drop in and castigate you and you have a contender for GRTOTY.

[collegegolfer]

Last time I looked, the RoG didn't say anything about that.

The 11th on my home course (as much as any course is my home course) is a par 5 I can drive, but only if I take a big rip at the ball. That occasionally turns my power fade into a slice. Fortunately, that just means it goes over the trees and into the 10th fairway, and from there my best play is sometimes straight towards the 10th tee. If that's my best play, I play it.

A par 5 you can drive? How is that even rated as a par 5?

[collegegolfer]

Wiggles, I play courses with course ratings of 73-75 and slopes of 130-150 that run 6700-7400 yards in length. My stroke average is 72.4 overall and 70.2 in tournaments the last 4 years.

In fact, last weekend I traveled and played a course that has a rating of 75.2 and a slope of 137 and I shot 69-73.

And earlier this year I played a course with a rating of 74.2 and a slope of 139 and shot 74.


If I had the money and time to pay for transportation out there right now I would JUMP at the chance to put you in your place.

[alangbaker]

A par 5 you can drive? How is that even rated as a par 5?

Sorry. Mispoke in my haste. It's a par 5 I can reach in 2 if I take a good rip.

Sorry for the confusion.

[collegegolfer]

Sorry. Mispoke in my haste. It's a par 5 I can reach in 2 if I take a good rip.

Sorry for the confusion.

Thanks for clarifying. I was about to agree with wiggles that only a goat track would have a par 5 you could drive.

[alangbaker]

Thanks for clarifying. I was about to agree with wiggles that only a goat track would have a par 5 you could drive.

That's why I put the asterisk on my 73/+2 round at Greenacres.j

The last is a very tight "par 5" that -- according to the "b*tchmove" brigade and the inside the course out of bounds line, you have to play down the fairway, hit a wedge around the corner (unless the tees are up) and then wedge on.

But it's such a sharp dogleg that it would be possible in theory to drive the green (about 350 yards). And when the tees are up, I can play the hole in driver, 6/7 iron.

To me, that's no par 5, so I always say I shot 73 on a par 70, even though the card reads par 71.